here is one:

Get away! your stupidity is contagious.

ive read this somewhere n is not my own quotes
"son:Why is a man not allowed to have more than one wife
father:Because the law protects those who are incapable of protecting themselves"

"statistics prove that marriageis a preventive of suicide.But on the other hand ,they also prove that suicide is a preventive of marriage."

"worker : I am a steady worker
Boss:You sure are.if u get any steadier,you would be motionless."

"Mother:Son,eat your spinach it's good for growing children.
Son:Who wants to grow children."

"the general will remain unequalled in history for his accomplishments on the bottle field"

"sign in window:don't kill your wife.let our washing machines do the dirty work"

"Clarksville,Tennessee,which calls itself the largests outdoor mule market in the world, held a mule parade yesterday headed by the governer