Quote:Hello, my dear dear friend!

Firstly, I'm honored to receive your response and I would like to take this opportunity to strongly express my feelings of absolute gratitude.  It's like a lonely bird flying through an empty, vast land, crying for help and companionship, finally meeting another bird, but of different gender.  You are like that other bird, whilst I am the lonely one, who is now filled with an immense euphoria at this meeting and opportunity to unite as one, a pair who's bond is so strong, not even a nuke could blow it up.
I believe relationships should be dynamic, to be able to adapt to changing circumstances, but on the other hand, it does also require constant attention to.  I agree that a constant sacrifice is indeed required, especially on the confessor's side (please see below for details).
I am quite an energetic man and I am seeking a young woman, preferably 13 years of age.  Unfortunately I do not have a lot of friends, so you should be able to comprehend my desperation.  I believe I am intelligent, as, after all, I have over 80 years of experience in life.
I enjoy indoor activities, especially those inside my bathroom, and I'd love to have someone to do the housework for me - yes! sharing it with two is twice better!
I am seeking for that special girl, who will become my playmate, of whom I can make love to at any moment of the day.  I have been seriously searching for my true love for 65 years, and now I can finally fulfill my life's dream, all thanks to you!
However, as mentioned earlier, relationships require constant sacrifice.  For such a relationship, I believe a sum of US$10,000 from you per year, paid upfront, would confirm your commitment towards me (you can pay now using PayPal; my address is <insert random email here>).  My constant sacrifice to you would be my unquestioning love and commitment to ensuring your ultimate relationship.

Yours sincerely,
Bob