awright here goes nothing



An old lady appears at a bank office with a bag full of money. She demands to speak to the director for opening an account, because the amount is huge. After causing a big fuss the staff take her to the director. The old lady tells him she has a lot of money that she wants to put in an account. When the director asks exactly how much money it is she has, she empties the bag with $50 million inside. Of course the director is curious as to where an old lady got such money.

"I bet" says the lady.

"Bet? What kind of bets?"

"For example, Ill bet you $25000 that your balls are square."

"That's ridiculous, obviously you wouldn't make a lot of money with bets like these."

"Well do you want to bet or not?"

"Of course. I bet you for $25000 that my balls are not square."

"Alright. But because its about such a large sum of money, do you mind if I come back tomorrow with my attorney, so that wee have a witness?"

"Sure, I understand its a lot of money you're talking about."

That night the bank director spent hours studying his balls. He became nervous, what if he lost $25000? He checked his balls from all possible angles before coming to the conclusion that his balls were in fact not square. The next day at 10 o'clock, the lady showed up at his office with her attorney, as promised. After repeating the bet, the bank director agrees again that he will bet for $25000 that his balls arent square.

Lady: "Alright then, please drop your pants." The director drops his pants. "Do you mind if I touch them?"

Director: "Sure, I understand it's a lot of money and you want to be sure."

While the lady is inspecting the director's balls with her hands, the director notices the attorney has started banging his head against the wall

Director: "What's up with your attorney?"

Lady: "Nothing much, except that I bet him for $125000 that i'd be holding a bank director's balls at 10 o'clock!!"

ROFLOL!!

There is an Asian, Mexican, and an American on a plane. Suddenly, the pilot comes on the intercom and says that the weight of the plane is too much and that they needed to each throw something off to keep the plane fling. The Asian throws his kid out the door and says "Its okay, wee have alot of those in our country" The Mexican throws his beer out the door and says "Wee have enough beer in our country, I'll get more" The American looks around and then throws the Mexican out the door and says, "Wee have enough of them in our country!"

heheheh

theres an airplane filled with all belgians and one dutch guy. the plane is too heavy, and suddenly in mid air the bottom half of the plane falls off and leaves all the passengers hanging from the overhead bins. the pilot says over the intercom that the plane is still too heavy for an emergency landing and that one passenger needs to let go. the belgians look at each other when suddenly the dutch man says ' ill do it '. The belgians are so moved that they all start to applaud

(This post was last modified: 03/11/2007 06:45 PM by Ge64.)

Chuck Norris' Tears Can Cure Cancer. To Bad He Never Cries. . .

When Bruce Banner gets mad, he turns into the Hulk. When the Hulk gets mad, he turns into Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris is not Politically Correct. He is just Correct. Always

Crop circles are Chuck Norris' way of telling the world that sometimes corn needs to lie the fudge down.

When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he isn't lifting himself up, he's pushing the Earth down

If a tree falls in the forest, does anybody hear? Yes. Chuck Norris hears it. Chuck Norris can hear everything. Chuck Norris can hear the shrieking terror in your soul

Chuck Norris frequently donates blood to the Red Cross. Just never his own.

(This post was last modified: 03/11/2007 07:36 PM by MoseZ.)

The KKK bought the rights to the movie Roots and played it in reverse for a happy ending