My brother just proved himself to be the king of projectile vomit. He's so good at it, he does it in his sleep. HIS SLEEP. I SHARE A BEDROOM WITH THIS MONSTER.

No joke, he's literally just sent chunks of half-digested pita bread, what looks like rice, and chicken flying; he's saturated a good 2m x 1m area of carpet; it's thick and (was) cream colored; and to compound it, he managed to clip the foot of my bed, and gently salt the carpet all down the hallway to our room with more chunks of regurgitated food.
That's solid saturation, and a good 5 metres of the only way in/out of the room with little "landmines". Real-life-troll-of-the-year award nominee, my brother.

I'd bring pictures, but my mum would consider it kind of crass and gross to be taking a picture, so I can't. Trust me; soak a good 3, maybe 4 cups of rice in bile, throw it at the carpet, and then you've got a good idea of what happened.

I think I'll sleep in my closet tonight.