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Joom
WOOP
Posts: 4,206.7320 Threads: 417
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FMLs
Have you guys ever read these? They're fudgein hilarious.
Today, the cops showed up to check out a child abuse complaint, I then had to spend an hour explaining that I had given my son a suppository. The neighbors heard him sobbing hysterically "Daddy, why did you put that in my butt? It hurts." My neighbor had heard and thought I was raping my son. FML
Today, I was in line at a checkout. I have quite a few facial piercings and 1/2" gauges in my ears. The very heavy cashier asks how big my gauges are and then starts telling me about how she recently got her clitoris pierced and how sometimes she has orgasms behind the register. FML
Today, I went to a new bar downtown with some friends. I was a little buzzed and had to pee so bad. I rushed into the bathroom and as I sat down I felt a squish on my upper thigh. Turns out the last person in the stall decided to take a spoon on the toilet seat. FML
Today, my friend said he'd give me 20 bucks if I would ask out the ugliest girl in school. I did it. She rejected me. FML
Today, I was texting a friend of mine. She mentioned it was her dad's birthday. I typed "Tell him Happy Birthday for me!" and as I pressed send I remember her dad was dead. FML
3DS Friend Code: 5000-6045-4964
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25/06/2009 12:23 AM |
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FMLs - Joom - 25/06/2009 12:23 AM
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