Now. Last time I left you lucky lot, I was staring at some grass underneath cycling road.

I've nothing better to do, so I'll just toddle on up the path-

My spider-sense is tingling. A battle soon. A tough one. Defeat is possible.

Gah! How the fudge did she beat me here?!


Wow. You're forward.

Once again, I think, Ramirez carries the team to ultimate victory, although her Marshtomp gave me a bit of a heart attack. Level 20 or so, and I have no grass-types or indeed, anything which might be super-effective against a water/ground combo. Only a team which is either neutral or weak to it's moves.
Luckily, I used Erhardt, gambled big, and instead of raping my spoon with water gun or muddy water or something, it used Bide. Seriously. Because Bide hangs up a pokemon for three turns effectively (including the turn it is started in) I was able to safely double-kick it to death.

Come on, sexual favor!

... I could do my usual joke about this not being [X], but that would be stale.

For a moment there, I thought you were getting a bit smarter. Apparently, I spoke too soon.

Let's not. Ever.

Alright, Mauville city! Town of... uh... I don't actually know what Mauville does. I think there's a casino or something. Town of hookers and blow?

House-barging time! I barge into a house, and...


Well, how about that?

I find it interesting how everyone in Hoenn who runs a store or something has a wierd name. "RYDEL", what mother would call her son that?


It's like being the owner of an outdoors shop and being called Hunter.

Yes. From a universe far, far away, where small monsters do not come out of tall grass to play.


What generosity! Back home in Kanto, bikes are worth like a million dollars or something.

Got to GO FAST
Now, in the pokemon center, I saw this strange man.

I listened. It was pretty spoon, to be fair.

Yes please.

So, this is what I have to work with? Disappointing.

I think it works. I wanted to have "BABIES" instead of pokemon, but I don't have a word like that. Perhaps I should have said "SMALL CHILDREN".

Outside the pogeymans GYM...

It's that sickly kid, being defiant and spoon.

I don't think he sees me.

I wonder if I can pick his pocket...

A little more...

Fuck! Hi, WALLY.

A bit sudden, but alright.

You realize that you just asked me to kick your spoon up and down the main street, right?

You are defeated. Not big suprise.

The rebellion is supressed! Hooray for me!

Not with people like you as my opponents, no.

That is true. Harden the fudge up and come back to me when I can't rape your spoon with Joanna in two turns.


I will come and bang any hot cousins WALLY might have.
WALLY and his UNCLE walked to the West, and that SCOTT guy showed up again.

This is creepy. Do you enjoy watching underaged boys, SCOTT?

Somewhat.

I was holding back, I wasn't even trying!

Oh, in that case, I beat his spoon mercilessly.

And he runs off, shouting HAH HA HUEH HUE and yelling BR? at people.


Mauville GYM! Yellow! Everywhere!

WATTSON? Electric-types? Oh good lord. If I had a name like that, I would train ground-types just to troll my parents and any challenging trainers.

This guy sounds like he's a couple of power-cells short of a battery-stack.

I'll not bore you with the details; I kicked the spoon out of his flunkies, and decided that I needed to beef up more, considering I have no type advantage, and it'll be a raw match of kicking his pokemon to death.

New route, new pokemon. Come at me, pokebros.


Lex Luthor will replace Joanna, as a grass-type which I will be training up to take on MAY's water/ground monster in the future.

Back to WATTSON.


Here's the team which will kick his donkey. (Except Ramirez, who, being a water/flying type, would get raped to buggery by one electric attack, so he will not participate.)

Supervillain?

Supervillain.

Foiling your evil plans, WATTSON!

Using my super-spy-fudge you.

You expect me to talk?

Uh... I kinda got caught up in the battle, and forgot to screencap any of it except the end. Upshot is, I either kicked or embered Wattson's bodyguard to death with Erhardt, while they paralyzed and generally trolled me with Shock Wave, an electric move which never misses.


YES! *zelda item aquisition music*
I am now another eighth more hipster, making me... three eighths hipster-er!


For once, a TM I actually like. Sadly, I have no electric types to teach this move to. Fate is cruel.


Verdanturf! A quiet town!

GEE, I WONDER IF WALLY IS IN HERE

For fudges sakes, I hate being right like this all the time.

Ha! I will stick my pocky in your eye every time wee meet, boy!
On a related note, his hot cousin is in the Rusturf Tunnel. Yes, I am now on the other side of it.

Charging power! HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
As for me, I had to stop - earlier sessions of Wipeout Pulse had drained the battery, and I was on like 6%.
Tomorrow looks to be an opportunity to pokemon some more, as nothing seems set to happen. I might not play pokemon, though. Wipeout's pretty fun.