I would go with azumi except for 3 and 4.

Beating the Hell out of it won't fix it and I've modded an xbox, there are no fuses.
I would open it up take some pictures and post it (So I can see what's going on).
Oh and before you ask you will need torx bit screwdriver.

You could also wait...I've had it happen where one day something seems broken and the next it appears to have fixed itself. Also if water was spilled on it, in some unkown way, it would give the water time to dry and it would work after that.