No offence, dude, but if she can't like you for who you are; not what you do, or what you have, then she isn't quite right for you.
I say let her go, ignore her, and go fishing again. You've made your apologies and explanations; now the metaphorical ball is in her court. She can either apologise for her (misguided due to lack of proof) accusations, or go take a long walk off a short pier, imo.
If seperation's what she wants, seperation and time to cool off is what she should get.
i guess i should feel more empowered and take things in my own hands
I was talking to one of my friends and she believed that my ex was very controlling and seeing it from tony's point of view who saw and is part of this forum as well i can assure you that ranting, explaining and sorting my thoughts here has helped me in my decision
I kinda envy you... Not because of your troubles, but because at least even here, you can discuss them.
I grew up dealing in my own isolation. Time taught me that it is probably not a good move. But then again, I am who I am.
Well, you're what 16-18? I miss the ignorance of teenage...
What I would have said has been said numerous times.
Silvertie Wrote: [ -> ]I say let her go, ignore her, and go fishing again.
The things she's said to you and accused you of - I would find that absolutely intolerable. Look elsewhere.
I probably shouldn't give you any advice on girlfriend matters since I'm a 20 years old and never had one but with my common sense I can say what Sick-chan wrote seems right to me. If your girlfriend doesn't love you for who you are then she doesn't seem to be the right one.
If I ever find a girl and for example she says: "Grow up and stop watching Animes" or "Stop being so funny about everything". I would seriously question myself if shes the right one for me.
I believe the fundamental base of a relationship should be that both partners accept each other for who they are with all the quirks and flaws they may have.
Change is okay for small things, like if you are an alcoholic it's good when your partner tries to help you change that. But as soon as someone tries to change fundamental parts of your self, I think chances are she never loved you for who you are but she loved what she could make out of you, if that makes any sense.
I start talking too much again so I just leave this post here now and wish you good luck whatever you may do^^
feinicks Wrote: [ -> ]I kinda envy you... Not because of your troubles, but because at least even here, you can discuss them.
I grew up dealing in my own isolation. Time taught me that it is probably not a good move. But then again, I am who I am.
Well, you're what 16-18? I miss the ignorance of teenage...
Yeah im really happy that i have an outlet to go to rather than just stuffing myself in a quiet place.
quite literally it has happened before and it would only get worst.
And im 20.
SkyDX Wrote: [ -> ]I probably shouldn't give you any advice on girlfriend matters since I'm a 20 years old and never had one but with my common sense I can say what Sick-chan wrote seems right to me. If your girlfriend doesn't love you for who you are then she doesn't seem to be the right one.
If I ever find a girl and for example she says: "Grow up and stop watching Animes" or "Stop being so funny about everything". I would seriously question myself if shes the right one for me.
I believe the fundamental base of a relationship should be that both partners accept each other for who they are with all the quirks and flaws they may have.
Change is okay for small things, like if you are an alcoholic it's good when your partner tries to help you change that. But as soon as someone tries to change fundamental parts of your self, I think chances are she never loved you for who you are but she loved what she could make out of you, if that makes any sense.
I start talking too much again so I just leave this post here now and wish you good luck whatever you may do^^
You know she told me that she still loves me but to change for her like that, she said that it wasn't a change because it would a small thing, like the alcoholism thing you said.
But when you brought up the point of:
"Stop being so funny about everything",
she has said that to me all the time. although yeah i do see the flaws of going overboard in the terms of some serious situations. but as of late she would never like me for me.
she kept asking me not to do this or not to do that.
And i started to get fed up with all of it.
How can you go off and tell me something but mean something else and still say that you love me.
That's not how things should work.
I think since it was both are first relationships wee tried are hardest for things to work out...sometimes i may have given her more than she thought. because when she says that i was never there for her....she gave a second thought to the fact whenever she got sick i was there no matter what making her food to make her get better or if she was tired i would just let her sleep.
Im kinda happy the way things are working out.
And like Sick said,
Sick_Demented99 Wrote: [ -> ]Well, only you can make the decision of whether or not you should be with her or not, but usually when you're in a relationship and someone says that they love you, that means they accept you for you, not for who they want you to be. So if she wants to change you, then the person she wants you to be is not really you. Unless... you want to change for her, and you love her that much.
its true. The first year together with her was all right but then she started trying to get me to do things i wasn't so 100% about and then later blamed me for my mistakes.
As I type this i am more leaning towards the point that she wasn't right for me.
Senseito7 Wrote: [ -> ]Silvertie Wrote: [ -> ]I say let her go, ignore her, and go fishing again.
The things she's said to you and accused you of - I would find that absolutely intolerable. Look elsewhere.
And that's what I plan to do....eventually.
What bothers me the most is that, wee were fixing things up and my friends actually thought that wee were going to be back together...
but what my friends didn't know that I knew was that.. she was going to go on a trip with her family over the weekend.
and i know how easily swayed she is... and i knew being with her family, the family that was never to sure about me, for the whole weekend would convince her that i was genuinely a malicious person and what I did to her in florida was inexcusable therefore i was doing it to hurt her feelings.
but i wasn't...
and she went on that trip
and when she got back she gave me that fated call
'eisen wee need to talk'
and i knew...i knew what she meant and i wanted to avoid it. but i couldnt and it happened..
and now i sit here contemplating all the what ifs
typing my thoughts to better understand the situation i am in.